Theatre of Blood – 1973
Vincent Price has reserved a seat for you in the “theatre of blood.”
Director
Douglas Hickox

Writer
Anthoiny Greville-Bell
Starring
Vincent Price
Diana Rigg
Ian Hendry
Harry Andrews
Coral Browne
Robert Coote
Jack Hawkins
Michael Hordern
Arthur Lowe
Robert Morley
Dennis Price
Milo O’Shea
Eric Sykes
Madeline Smith
Diana Dors

Review by Noel Baily

The film which sends poodles into a total funk!
This WAS Vincent Price’s finest screen moment and I recall clearly at the time, one particular UK critic who suggested “This brilliant film will probably require a generation before it can ever be held in the esteem to which it is entitled!”

Way too literate for mainstream horror fans’ taste – it was so much more. Few had the theatrical flourish of Vincent Price and he was just so perfectly cast as the acting-legend-in-his-own-mind disfavored by a cross section of critics that may otherwise have steered his career on to the rocks. Taking “tragedy” to a new level, he REALLY silencies his critics once and for all, taking them out one by one in escalatingly appropriate Shakespearean circumstances.

Black black dialog with the Bard’s turn of a phrase pervades the entire film. Yeah its gory – so’s Macbeth! It is also one of the greatest horror comedies ever devised, with A-List acting credits.
Quite simply, NOT to be missed!

Review by Theo Robertson

The Memory Cheats,
The late John Nathan Turner , the most controversial producer of DOCTOR WHO came up with the expression ” The memory cheats ” . What he meant by that is memory can play tricks on you , a fondly remembered DOCTOR WHO story with the production values of LORD OF THE RINGS ( Or so it seemed at the time ) can be severely disappointing when you re-watch after a gap of 20 years . A battle scene of The Brigadier leading his men against an alien invasion might have seemed like the 1973 eqivulent of BLACK HAWK DOWN but less so when watched 30 years later . I do disagree with what JNT said about the memory cheating but not totally
Unfortunately when watching THEATRE OF BLOOD after a gap of many , many years my memory has cheated more than slightly . I remember enjoying this movie one helluva lot but couldn`t remember why and after seeing it again tonight I was slightly puzzled why I had so many loving memories about it . Okay it`s not a bad movie but it`s not a great one either . Check out this sample of dialogue :

” Are you saying someone in the theatre is trying to kill us ? ”
” I would say that`s a distinct possiblity ”

What is it about the above ? Is the dialogue written in a flat manner or are the actors giving a flat performance ? It should also be pointed out that the fatal punishments inflicted upon the critics were someting I once remembered as being grotesque and funny but now seem rather silly especially when you stop to consider the plot holes involved such as how did Lionheart and his posse manage to hire a hair salon and TV van ? I also find it difficult to believe that no one guessed the identity of the hippy geezer with the moustache . Even if I had never seen this movie before I would have known who was Lionheart`s right hand man , it`s so obvious it`s laughable.

To be fair this isn`t a movie that takes itself seriously and is all the better for being devoid of the post modernist humour of SCREAM and JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK ( Did you know the most popular plot for a Hollywood horror movie nowadays involves internet film critics getting murdered ? It`s true you know ) and Vincent Price is very well cast as the mincing thespian luvvie who is hell bent on revenge and the camp hairdresser called ” Butch ” did make me smile . Oh and I did love the way policeman are portrayed as being both useless and stupid . I actually thought those bits were taken from a documentary.

Not as good as I remembered , but I thought it was a masterpiece when I saw it as a child and nothing is that good in the cold light of adulthood so I give THEATRE OF BLOOD six out of ten in 2004.

Theatre of Blood (1973)

Review by Wayne Malin

Easily one of Price’s best,
Vincent Price plays Edward Lionheart, a Shakesprean actor that the critics hate (one calls him a “ham sandwich”). Enraged by their reviews of his works he commits suicide. But, unknown to everybody else, he survives and decides to kill off his critics one by one using methods described in Shakespeare’s plays.

A lot of people have called this “The Abominable Dr. Phibes Part 3″. They’re not too off the mark–the plot lines are very similar. Still this is better than the Phibes films. It moves quickly, has a large cast of excellent British actors (unknown over here) and some of the deaths are much gorier (this has an R rating–Phibes was PG). If you look very closely at the plot there are huge loopholes and some unlikely situations but it still is a huge amount of fun. There’s also a truly incredible saber fight between two men.

This must have been a dream role for Price–he gets to preform Shakespeare and wear a variety of disguises to become different characters. He’s just great (as always). Diana Rigg pops up as his daughter–she’s not given much to do but looks fantastic. The critics are all well-played by a very talented roster of British actors–I really do wonder how they got some of them to do this (it’s pretty bloody). The most outlandish portrayal is by Robert Morley as a gay critic with (sigh) two poodles. It might be offensive if this were a serious movie. Also Price met Coral Browne here and married here in 1974–and stayed married till she passed away.

This, oddly, remains unknown even to Price fans. That’s a shame–it’s one of his best. Horror, humor and Shakespeare–what more do you need?

A 10 all the way.